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Why I Became a Sex Therapist
- Holly Wood
- 12 minutes ago
- 5 min read
Have you ever looked back at your life and realized that each chapter—no matter how painful, joyful, or unexpected—was gently guiding you toward your purpose? That’s how I feel about becoming a sex therapist. It wasn’t a linear path, but it was a deeply intentional one.
In this blog, I want to share with you the heart of why I chose this work: the early sparks of curiosity, the experiences that shaped me, and the calling I feel every day to create a space where people can heal, feel safe, and reclaim joy in their sexuality and relationships.
Following the Thread of Curiosity
From a young age, I was drawn to understanding human behavior—what drives us, how we connect, and especially how we navigate intimacy. But what I noticed even early on was that no one really talked about sex in a real or healthy way. It was either whispered about with shame or sensationalized in media.
This contrast stirred something in me. I remember thinking: Why is something so central to who we are treated like it’s taboo? That question stayed with me through undergrad and into my graduate studies in psychology and human sexuality. The more I learned, the more I realized how much harm silence and misinformation can do—especially when it comes to sex and intimacy.
When the Personal Becomes Professional
Like many therapists, my interest in this work is also personal. I won’t share every detail here (because even therapists get to have boundaries!), but I will say this: I’ve had to do my own healing around sex, relationships, and trauma. I’ve experienced moments where I felt disconnected from my body, unsure of my desires, and uncertain how to voice my needs.
And I know I’m not alone in that. My own healing journey deepened my empathy and made me passionate about creating the kind of space I wish I’d had—one where vulnerability is met with warmth, not judgment.
Choosing to Specialize in Sex Therapy
When I decided to pursue formal training in sex therapy, I knew it would be a commitment—not just academically, but emotionally and ethically. I trained through the American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors, and Therapists (AASECT), which set a high bar for competency, inclusion, and cultural responsiveness.
My work is grounded in evidence-based practice, but it’s also heart-centered. I specialize in working with individuals and couples navigating:
Sexual trauma and recovery
Desire discrepancies
Body image and sexual self-esteem
LGBTQIA+ identity and exploration
Communication challenges around sex
Pelvic pain and its impact on intimacy
Sex therapy is not just about "fixing a problem"—it’s about helping people come home to themselves. It’s about expanding what’s possible in terms of pleasure, connection, and self-understanding.
What I’ve Learned From My Clients
One of the greatest honors of my life is getting to witness people’s stories. I’ve sat with clients who have never said the word “sex” out loud before. I’ve held space for people who have survived unimaginable harm and are learning to trust their bodies again. I’ve celebrated with couples who finally feel heard, seen, and turned on—for the first time in years.
What I’ve learned is this: when we create space for people to speak the truth about their sexual selves, healing happens. Not overnight, and not always easily—but it happens.
Sex therapy gives people permission to be whole. It says, "You don’t have to leave any part of yourself at the door."
Three Core Beliefs That Guide My Work
1. Sex Is Not Separate From the Rest of You
Your sexual self is part of your whole self. When you ignore or silence that part, it can affect your mental health, relationships, and sense of identity. In my work, I help clients reconnect with all parts of themselves—including the ones that feel scary or unfamiliar.
2. Healing Happens in Safe Relationships
Therapy is about co-regulation. It's about sitting with someone who won’t flinch when you share the thing you’ve never said out loud. That’s the kind of space I strive to offer—a place where shame can unravel and something softer can take root.
3. There’s No One “Right” Way to Be Sexual
I work from a sex-positive, inclusive, and trauma-informed lens. That means I honor your values, your desires, and your boundaries. There’s no agenda except helping you feel more aligned with who you are and what you want.
Integration & Reflection
If you’re reading this and thinking, “I’ve never felt safe talking about this,” or “I didn’t even know sex therapy was a thing,” I see you. That’s why I share my story—not because it’s about me, but because it might help you feel less alone.
Here are a few reflection questions if you’re curious about your own sexual healing or growth:
What messages did you receive about sex growing up?
How do you feel in your body during moments of intimacy?
What would you want to explore if you knew you wouldn’t be judged?
You don’t have to have all the answers to start. You just need a willingness to be curious.
Support & Resources
If you’re looking for a therapist who gets it—who understands the nuance of trauma, pleasure, and everything in between—I’d be honored to support you.
You can also follow me on Instagram for more insights, tips, and gentle reminders that your sexuality is not a problem to be fixed—it’s a part of you to be honored.
Becoming a sex therapist wasn’t just a career choice—it was a calling. Every day, I get to support people as they unlearn shame, rediscover pleasure, and build relationships rooted in honesty and care. And that, to me, is sacred work.
If you’re ready to begin or deepen your journey toward sexual healing, let’s connect. Book a free consultation or subscribe to my newsletter for insights, updates, and encouragement.
Your story matters. Your pleasure matters. And healing is possible.
About the author
Holly is a leading expert in sexual health based in Orange County, certified as both a clinical sexologist and AASECT sex therapist. With Ph.D. studies in Human Sexuality and extensive experience in sex therapy, sexual wellness, and relationship counseling, Holly provides evidence-based insights to clients in Orange County, the state of California and beyond. Recognized for expertise in libido, sexual dysfunction, and intimacy, Holly is dedicated to empowering individuals with practical advice and research-backed strategies. For more, follow Holly for expert advice on sexual health and relationships.
Visit www.thehollywoodsexologist.com to learn more and request a consultation.
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